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  • Writer's pictureEddie Gilman

Waiting and Your Darkest Hour

Waiting and Your Darkest Hour

Someone once told me "I hope that one day you can be content in your life with just God". At the time, I felt offended and judged by that comment. Immediately my self-righteousness kicked in and I thought "I've been a Christian for 20 years, and they don't understand what I've been through!" I realized not long after, that it was actually God who was speaking to me through that person. This one statement changed my life. What does this have to do with the topic today? It's simply the answer. Why say more? Because sometimes the "pill" isn't easy to swallow. In fact, the journey towards “Christ-centered-contentment” may take some time. It has been my experience that faith is usually a process. There are times however, that we obtain great faith in a moment. This is mentioned as one of the gifts of the Holy Spirit. But faith, like trust, is more often than not built upon a growing relationship. And the more we know God's character, the easier it becomes to trust Him. The process will look different for everyone. And it's easy to get discouraged along the way. Sometimes we hang on for a long time, believing and believing! But not seeing. Sometimes we pray so much, and expect in that moment for "our" thing to happen. And maybe it didn’t. For a lot of us, this may be where we decide to "hang it up". We discussed the great men and women of faith previously; Noah spent over 100 years building an ark when no one had ever seen rain before. "I could never do that!" you might say. Yes you can! Because when you know God, all things are possible! I want to address what I believe to be the two largest roadblocks in our faith. Waiting on God and overcoming fear. First, to those that are waiting for something to happen in their life. You may be at a place right now where you have been waiting for a relationship, children, to get married, healing, a job, or direction in life. And you may have been waiting for years! First of all I want to say, don't give up! God's timing is always perfect. It does not mean you will understand it. And also know that God gave you that desire! One thing I observe in people quite often is the tendency to believe that they feel like the exception. When God was handing out the blessings, they were obviously forgotten about. This is not true! The Bible says that the Lord knew you before time began. He knitted you together in your mother's womb. And He knows the number of hairs on your head. The Lord created you with the desires you now have! Grab hold of that and ask God to prove to you that His word is true! I don't believe it is wrong to ask God for a sign. It is not His will for you to be miserable. But He may teach you patience. He teaches me everyday. Literally! "When you have nothing, you can possess all things. If you rely on anything other than God, you cannot possess the greater things. The infinite God is behind the person who has no trust in earthly things; he is in a place where he is trusting in nothing but God." – Smith Wigglesworth For those waiting, know that I understand how hard it is. And that sometimes you may even give up just to end up giving God another try. Do not beat yourself up over this. God knew we would anyway. He is shaping you in ways you cannot imagine! And most likely preparing you for the very thing you are waiting to receive. I can tell you from my own experiences, that the times in my life when I wanted something really bad, I did not typically receive them until I left it at God's feet. God is very serious about His word, and He gave two commandments. Love your God with all your heart, mind, soul and strength. And love your neighbor as yourself. God is not going to give you an idol to put before Him in your life. He is too jealous over you. He loves you too much! So I say, the sooner you seek Him the sooner the blessing comes. And please understand, this is not a game. Because what God really wants you to discover is that in Him are all good things! Which we will touch on again later. And I can say from my own experience that this is true. If you recall my opening statement; that was nothing more than God reminding me of something I had forgotten. Because my life had become out of sync with Him. And I was not desperate for Him anymore. I was living very selfishly. Do not give up waiting! They that wait upon the Lord will renew their strength! Be desperate for God! In fact, I would challenge you to seek God in such a way that you try to figure out why He made you the way He has. Why He has given you the desires you now have. There is no secret, knowledge, or wisdom that the Lord cannot give to those thirsty for Him. You will be so overwhelmed by Him in the process, you may end up forgetting that you wanted that thing. And then be blown away by how He brings it into your life anyway. Remember, God gave us the desire to desire the "thing". And He will give us the desires of our hearts, because they were His desires put in us to begin with.

Mark 11:23 - "If a person does not doubt in his heart, but believes that those things he says

will be done, he will have whatever he says."

Numbers 23:19 - "God is not a man, that He should lie, nor a son of man, that He should

change His mind. Does He speak and then not act? Does he

promise and not fulfill?"

Jeremiah 33:3 - "Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great

and unsearchable things you do not know."

To those of you who feel like you may be walking through the darkest hours of your life; God is with you! My heart aches for you. I know the pain and despair; the hopeless and lost thoughts. You wonder if it will ever end, and you would give anything to make the pain stop! The loneliness, the tears, the bad dreams. Your world, your life could be summed up in one word - hell! There are not words I can type that can describe the depth of pain and confusion that come in that dark hour. But God! God can and will deliver you friend! Run to Him! Cry out to Him! Cling to Him! His yoke is easy, His burden is light! Run to Him all you who are weary and heavily burdened, and He will give you rest! Remember, God is not a man that He can lie! He gives peace that surpasses all understanding! I live in this peace as I type this. When you ask, you will receive; if you do not doubt! When you receive, know that you may never thirst for anything ever again! His peace is intoxicating, it calms every storm! You can live in the middle of your storm, and sleep peacefully in the boat so to speak. Jesus calmed the storm in a word. He can do the same in yours. Know that He loves you! Know that He thought of you when He hung on the cross! As far as the east is from the west, is the greatness of God's love for you!

Romans 8:38 - "For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels or demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor any other living creature, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."

My friends, if the voice in your head does not conform to the character of God; it is a lie! The Bible says we do not wrestle with flesh and blood, but with rulers, authorities, powers in this dark world. And spiritual forces of evil in the Heavenly realms. It also describes the devil as a prowling lion seeking for whom he may destroy. God has infinite love and value for you and your life. He will not leave you or forsake you! His love for you knows no limits. If you allow yourself to believe anything contrary to this or what is in His word (who He is) then you are taking the bait. I know that you might think this is easy for me to say. But please understand, I have walked in it myself. I have contemplated the value of my life, and the lack of it. I have been paralyzed (literally) in pain and despair. It’s when God feels a million miles away, and the other voice is saying "he is". But when you know God, you can seize the lies. You can grab hold of hope and life. We are often told that God will never give us more than we can bear. That is actually not what the Bible says at all! It says He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. I have walked through God giving me more than I can bear. How then, can I be here typing this? Because it was not I that pulled me through it. Only God could! And if He hadn't I may very well not be here typing this. I can't tell you how great His love for you is. And that He withholds no good thing from those who seek His face. Jesus said we would face many difficulties in life. And in Hebrews it says to endure hardship as discipline from God. I know that sounds harsh on God's part. But if you continue reading (Hebrews 12: 7-13) it describes God as our Father and we as children. A father does not discipline the child he loves to enforce pain and harm. But to bring about good. To break bad habits we are developing that we could never imagine the consequences of later in life. "Nothing happens to the believer except what is good for him. For all things work together for the good of those who love God. God has you for a purpose." - Smith Wigglesworth "Surely the Lord is not going to send you away empty. He wants to satisfy your longing soul with good things." - Smith Wigglesworth Philippians 4 verse 7 says: "And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus". Be desperate for Him! The answers, the longings; the desires, the freedom from all dark things is in Him. Do you have God or does He have you? Reach out, He is there! Be desperate for Him!

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